Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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