woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Your cock deserves a montage
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize