he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Shame - the story of my life.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
