Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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