I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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