wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
