I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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