my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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