And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
how drunk are you?
Several
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
