Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
