After last night, I could never be a politician.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
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