you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
