I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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