Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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