She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
