Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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