She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
