Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize