I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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