Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Can i not drive my cunt home
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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