I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
