Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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