i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
There r osticjed everywhere
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
