I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
