Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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