the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Randomize
