Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
