i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
