I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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