I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Randomize
