Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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