Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
This baby is an asshole
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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