dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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