Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
the raccoons are back...
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