These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
