I hope mine doesn't look like that
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
