You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Randomize
