so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
