Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize
