She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Randomize