I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
