Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
