He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I feel great
I just peed on a car
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
