we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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