Princesses don't give blow jobs
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
So vagazzling was a success
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
