kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize