She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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