I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
