I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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