All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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