Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
